'We're gonna die': Firearms officer who killed Jean Charles de Menezes speaks of 'painful' memories for the first time

A senior firearms officer who shot a man wrongly suspected of being a terrorist has recalled thinking "he's gonna blow. We're gonna die" shortly before pulling the trigger.

Speaking for the first time 20 years on from the shooting, the senior firearms officer, known only as C12, has recounted events as part of Channel 4's Shoot To Kill: Terror On The Tube documentary.

Brazilian Jean Charles de Menezes was shot dead a fortnight after suicide bombers exploded devices on three Tube lines and a London bus on July 7 2005, killing 52 people.

Having remained anonymous for nearly two decades, the officer admitted of the incident: "reliving it in this detail is painful".

The officer, known only as C12, said: "I want to make sure that people understand these decisions, although they're taken quickly, they're not taken lightly."

Following the July 7 attacks, would-be suicide bombers targeted the transport network again on July 21, but their devices failed to explode.

The following day, 27-year-old electrician Mr de Menezes was mistaken for one of them and shot seven times by two marksmen at Stockwell Tube station, south London.

It comes at a time when the role of Met firearms officers has been placed under a microscope once again, in the wake of the recent killing of Chris Kaba in south London.

On July 23, Scotland Yard confirmed Mr de Menezes was not connected to the July 21 attacks.

"Because of his actions, what he did, the information we received, it left me with no other conclusion than I had to act or we were going to die," the officer admitted.

He explained that de Menezes' demeanour had led him to believe the electrician was preparing to detonate a bomb on the London Underground.

The manner in which Mr De Menezes stood up "triggered" something in his head, the officer claimed.

"He knew who we were. He still continued on his forward momentum as I had my weapon up, pointing at his head," the officer said.

"I remember the surveillance officer then in full body contact with him, and apparently what he was trying to do was pin his hands so that he couldn't detonate.

"I'm expecting an explosion at any moment, he's gonna blow. We're gonna die. But that's the nub of it.

Adding: "If I don't do something now, we are all going to die."

Dame Cressida Dick, who was promoted to Metropolitan Police commissioner in 2017, led the operation in which Mr de Menezes died.

A jury cleared her of any blame in his death at the end of the prosecution of the Met under health and safety laws.

Sir Tony Blair, who was prime minister at the time, and Gesio de Avila, a close friend of Mr de Menezes, have contributed to the two-part documentary, with senior police officers and civilian witnesses also featuring.

The programme will look at the marksman's "understanding of the role of the police as 'goodies vs baddies'" and "the pressure of being at the centre of one of the most controversial moments in the history of British policing."

Alisa Pomeroy, head of documentaries at Channel 4, said: "I hope that hearing the personal testimony of the firearms officer involved in the tragic shooting of Jean Charles De Menezes will help the British public understand the complexity of the atmosphere in London that summer, and what was subsequently the events surrounding what became one of the biggest crises in British policing history."

Dov Freedman, chief executive and co-founder of production company Curious Films, which made the documentary, added: "The films capture a very specific moment in the summer of 2005 when the UK was living under the very real threat of terrorism, and air of huge uncertainty and tension was high across the nation.

"The access to the previously anonymous firearms officer is unparalleled, with his candid interview providing unique insight about that time."

It follows the acquital of Met firearms officer Martyn Blake following the fatally shooting Mr Kaba.

The officer, 40, stood trial after shooting the 24-year-old through the front windscreen of an Audi Q8 in Streatham, south-east London, in September 2022.

Following the incident, Met Commissioner, Sir Mark Rowley, announced he wants armed police to be exempt from criminal charges for shootings unless prosecutors can prove that the officer in question departed from training.

Rowley also requested investigations to be sped up so officers are mired in criminal investigations and disciplinary proceedings for less long, the Times reported.

Shoot To Kill: Terror On The Tube will air on November 10 and 11 on Channel 4.